A design for life… how this week turned out exactly as I planned and I feel great about it

This week has been a landmark week. By design.

I decided I had to do two things and I did them.

Firstly, as I’ve mentioned already, I decided to start running. It’s something I’ve been meaning to do for years but just never got around to.

Now I’ve done it. And I’m loving it. I invested in some decent shoes and really am looking forward to getting fitter.

The other one is a bit more strange as really it wasn’t really my decision, but it was my decision to act to force the issue this week for my own sake, and accept it.

I’ve mentioned before how I messed up a relationship last year. I’ve really struggled to get over it. And I’ve been clinging on to the hope it may resolve itself. I’m very much a ‘glass half-full’ person (otherwise known as ‘a bit stupid’).

Anyway, it couldn’t go on. I know I’ve been wasting my time. So I forced the issue and got a definitive reply (that I already knew of course). But I needed it.

Three things happened on Tuesday when I got the reply.

Firstly, I didn’t feel much. I’d known since last year anyway, so it wasn’t upsetting. It was actually a relief. I could finally move on.

Secondly, I realised, by the nature of the reply, that the person I’ve been pining for never actually existed. I don’t want to get nasty or sound too bitter, but it’s just a fact that I wouldn’t want to be with the sort of person she turned out to be. I’d never act the way she did. So, as a good female friend said this week, very much her loss not mine. And I realised that, no matter what I did do, it wasn’t just that that messed up the relationship, it was messed up from the start and I shouldn’t blame myself as much as I have been.

And thirdly – and most bizarrely – that afternoon and evening, and every day since, my dating sites have been going crazy. I’ve been using them half-heartedly all year in the hope of finding someone nice enough to make me move on but haven’t. I haven’t even been on a date since January or February. I just couldn’t be bothered.

But as soon as I mentally accepted the person I was hoping to get back with didn’t really exist and it would never happen, the dating sites went crazy. I’m not joking. Emails, winks, favourites, matches on Tinder etc etc.

In the last few months I’ve turned down a few promising offers – for the best, I wasn’t ready – but now I’m not only getting promising offers from interesting looking/sounding women but I’m making the effort to contact ones I like the sound of too.

I do like the idea of the Law of Attraction (ie, the type of thing mentioned in ‘The Secret’), but I’m probably too logical to ever fully believe it. But I have to admit it certainly seemed to happen this week.

It really was like the universe said “ok, you’ve finally accepted it – at last. Jeez, that took long enough. Right, now I’ll send you these lovely women… I know one of them will be perfect for you and vice-versa’

I agreed to meet a women for a date today although it didn’t come off (she was too hungover apparently and didn’t fancy the long drive to meet half-way). It doesn’t matter. It’s the fact I was prepared to go that matters. The first time I’ve been prepared to go on a date since the start of the year.

And maybe we’ll reschedule, that’d be nice, but if not there are plenty of other options.

So I started the week with two aims. And I achieved them both.

Now I’m looking forward to a great summer of meeting new people (just one will do!) and getting fit, rather than dwelling on a past that didn’t really even exist.

I was going to say a weight has been lifted off my shoulders but, better than that, I lifted the weight off myself.

RTFM!

Ok, I admit, I’m not one for reading manuals. Never have been.

I realised last night I’ve been programming and using computers for way over 30 years now. And I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve really read manuals (I vividly remember the excitement of reading the manual for The Quill – a text adventure game creator, and the HUGE stack of books that came with the very reasonably-priced Borland C/C++ compiler).

I’ve just finished day 3 of #C25K. Loved it. For a start, I had a better playlist on, which helped.

Then I got home to see that tomorrow is Day 1 of Week 2…

Ah.

It turns out I should have been running every other day to give my muscles time to recover.

Whoops.

Still, I seem to have survived but maybe I should take tomorrow off and then go to the every other day system. And maybe I should read the f’ing manual.

 

Fitness, Personal

Day two – done

Don’t worry, I’m not going to keep a running update (no pun intended) on my blog, but I’ve just finished day 2 of #C25K (couch to 5k – sorry, forgot to mention what it stood for yesterday).

Today’s run was much easier. Even to the point that when I got in and sat down for a drink, I wished it had been a bit harder. But I know that’ll come in time and I need to stick to doing what the app says whilst I get fitter.

My new running shoes certainly made a big difference. Not quite sure if it’s better to say it’s like running on air or running on springs (big difference I know but…). The are so comfortable it’s incredible. Not going to win any prizes for fashion but that’s not the point is it.

And my new running top and shorts were much better to run in too and, after a few seconds, I forgot I was running in skin tight shorts with no underwear and looked like a total prick (again, no pun intended).

And, like yesterday, apart from cars going past, I didn’t see a single person. Thankfully!

Onwards and upwards.